Sunday, May 2, 2010

coming to the end

of my temp position. The girl I am replacing is supposedly coming back tomorrow. they ahve asked me to stay on "through the middle of the month" but i think they will see once she is back that there really is nothing for me to do. So I will be able to get back to my old antics.

I keep going to sit down at my craft desk, but there is either limited mojo, or too mmuch that needs to get done. I applaud you working moms who keep a clean house and still have time to craft. I just don't have the time management skills or energy to do it.

Working has been a very good thing for me. I have made a new friend. I have met new people who, although I don't see myself hanging out with, have made my day a bit brighter and more fun. I am useful again, for something other than housework and babysitting. I know, I know, it's an important job, blah blah blah. But when i tell people I am a stay at home mom, they look at me like "oh, wow. so you aren't smart enough or ambitious enough to have a real job." the conversation slows, like i wouldnt be able to hold my own because i take care of my kids. If you aren't a SAHM, you can't possibly understand. Just trust me when I say that it's not a good feeling.

It's been nice to earn a little money in my own name for once. Not that I make enough to make a dent, but enough to feel like my days have been of use. My first pay check I took out, bought groceries, a birthday gift, and some stuff at sams club and came home with $60. A whole weeks work, chaos at home, and I made grocery money! but in the grand scheme of things, we all have to eat right.

So consider this my salute to you women who work full time jobs. It's difficult, and I am looking forward to going back to simpler times. being able to just pick up and meet luke for lunch, going to the school for things like eater egg hunts and christmas parties... I am going to miss the kids' field day later this week and that makes me sad. very sad. But it's worth an extra couple hundred bucks if it's the only chance I have to make it for a long time.

Well, all things considered, it's been a good experience. got me out, got me moving, made me realize that although my situation isn't ideal, it could be much worse. I do need a vacation from my kids. I haven't been without them for longer than they are in school since last june when i came down here to look at houses with luke. we need another getaway. I NEED ANOTHER GETAWAY! when we lived in Wyoming, I got to go to Salt Lake once a month and got out of the house for at least 18-36 hours. I miss that very much. I miss my sanity breaks.

Maybe again someday. Maybe I can talk luke into letting me take a solo road trip around the south soon for photos and junking.

Will try to play again soon, I was doing so good with this blog for a long time, and now I am a bad bad blogger. Remind me, i'll try!

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