Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Feeling a little out of sorts

You ever have one of those days where it feels like someone put a blindfold on you, spun you around in circles until you puked, then gave you a stick and left? Yeah, I kinda feel like that. I havent had anything that even looks like a lead on a job. I am going to go see a councelor on friday, hopefully that will help. I have not been myself for a long time and hopefully talking to someone will help me get back to happy.

I sat and had a good cry with Lindsey last night, thanks sis. Sometimes you just can't hold it in anymore. Or you don't even realize you are holding it in. You just open your mouth and everything comes out. Things you didn't even know you were feeling. It's kinda scary. Cause once you say it, you're like DAMN. where did that come from?

My best friend in the whole wide world has been noticably absent, he is going through some stuff right now too and is focusing on that. It's hard to feel like you are drifting farther away from the people who matter most to you. I've been really bad lately about just shutting people off. So for those of you I've done that to, I'm sorry. Kinda hard to have friends when you don't really want to talk to anyone cause you don't know what to say.

So I am trying to not be a debbie downer. I am trying to not burden everyone else with my problems. I know, that's what friends are for. But there is only so much negative your friends can handle before they don't want to be around you anymore. So I am trying to reserve my bitching! Right now I am just trying to enjoy time with my sister and my kids. Hopefully the weather will be nicer this weekend. While it's not cold or consistently raining, it is super windy.

I need to get my camera out and start using it. Just really feel incredibly uninspired. Maybe soon. I'll try to be better about posting, although most people visit this blog for scrappy purposes. I didn't bring any scrapbooking stuff with me at all this summer. Yep, DEPRESSING. but I was packing a ton of bags anyway and really didn't feel up to scrapping, so why go through the hassle of bringing stuff with me, just to have it sit and take up space where there really isn't any.

Hasta for now.


  1. Hey you, go breathe some of that Kauai air! Long deep breathes and look around you. Close your eyes, let the wind take your breathe away. Then open them and see again

    "What good are wings if you can't feel the wind in your face"

  2. hiya sweet,

    hunny i'm sorry i havent' spoken to you much on FB, if you need me you can just drop me an email or a message. i hope you'll be ok - i know it's a hard time right now. hopefully you're counselor appointment will help. get something creative done, and go out with your camera - i'm challenging you!!!

  3. Sorry things are in a bad way for you. I stumbled on your blog from Arcalee's list, I liked the title, then I realized it was you when I got here. I'm sure it stinks to be in the 2nd happiest place on earth and just feel awful. Sometimes seeing a bunch of happy people (vacationing, enjoying hte beach etc.) makes it worse. Hope things get better soon.


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